


Liminal Spaces

by Godoflaundrybaskets (digiella)



Category: Star Wars (Marvel Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-22
Updated: 2016-04-22
Packaged: 2018-10-31 02:36:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10889910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/digiella/pseuds/Godoflaundrybaskets
Summary: "For the last time,I amnotan exorcist." Vader grits his teeth glancing with growing alarm as the noises grew louder. He still can't see anything. The car shakes and if that one dented the door he is going to rip this spirit into shreds and leave it screaming in the darkness."Yeah, I know. You're a median." Aphra's tone is light but when he glances at her she's clutching the door and looking half ready to bolt out of the car.





	Liminal Spaces

**Author's Note:**

> @siths-sirenia OKAY. So I’ve been working on this forever. Like, you posted that piece almost a whole month ago. But this gave me ideas and I really am having fun with this AU and there will probably be more (though I always say that).
> 
> CW: Intrusive violent thoughts. (Also, please keep in mind that Vader is not the most reliable of narrators.)
> 
>  
> 
> * * *
> 
> <http://siths-sirenia.tumblr.com/post/141815435494/meme-vaderaphra-modern-roadtrip-au>

> He’d been close to falling asleep, weary after eight hours of non-stop driving, when he felt Aphra frantically shaking his shoulder and demanding he wake up at once. Agitated by the disturbance, Vader cast her an annoyed look before their car was suddenly jolted by an unseen force.
> 
> “Either someone’s trying to break into the car, or this rest stop is haunted.”

 

Vader scrambles up trying to get a glimpse out the window for whatever had hit the car. The rest stop was empty as it was when they pulled in close to 1 AM. Vader wasn't about to let Aphra drive his baby . He'd seen _her_ car and just the thought of that made him shudder. 

There was a certain brand of mechanic, sure, that could keep a car alive long past the time it should have been abandoned. He was one of them once. And he is sure that Aphra is a more than competent driver. She would have to be. But, he isn't sure that anyone without an engineering degree and maybe some experience with rocket engines could be expected to drive her monstrosity. And he wasn't taking any chances here. It was bad enough that he'd been blackmailed - kidnapped - whatever into accompanying her.

"For the last time, _I am_ not _an exorcist_." Vader grits his teeth glancing with growing alarm as the noises grew louder. He still can't see anything. The car shakes and if that one dented the door he is going to rip this spirit into shreds and leave it screaming in the darkness.

"Yeah, I know. You're a median." Aphra's tone is light but when he glances at her she's clutching the door and looking half ready to bolt out of the car.

"No! I am not!" His voice is lowered into a growl irritation seeping through the fear and the anger breaking his focus for a moment. He's told her, over and over, these past few days that they've been trapped in this car together that whatever she's heard or read about him _is wrong_ but she hasn't let it go for a moment.

"That's why you were doing all that psychic training with Obi-Wan when--"

"Is this really the time?" Vader fumbles at the door for a moment -- the prosthetic for his right arm is still off and sitting on the back seat but there's not time -- (at least he hadn't bothered taking off his foot) -- and he stumbles outside. He glares about, daring whatever is around to show itself. 

"Uh, should I get out too? Because it seems to be getting--," Aphra's voice cuts off as the door slams shut and Vader heard the locks slam.

Of course all Aphra cares about is how he trained under _Kenobi_ and how Vader could help her with her 'quest.' Quiet, unassuming _Kenobi_ whose name is still feared if you asked in the right circles even though the man has done nothing in the past few years. _Kenobi_ who has kept Vader's power hostage for just as long. He'd fled from Kenobi's tender 'care' and hated himself for running away like a coward instead of ripping out the man's liver and feeding it to him. 

He tried every method he could find to regain his Power. Nothing had worked and eventually he had resigned himself to a mundane life. He hadn't made his peace with it (how could he after all Kenobi took?) but he'd been... stable. Then Aphra crashed -- somewhat literally -- into his apartment's office.

He turned around slowly, ignoring Aphra's muffled shouts from inside the car. The noise cuts off as he steps away from the car, towards the restrooms and the picnic table. It's still dark, but the street lights make dull halos in the fog. He scowls. 

The fog swirls around him suddenly and he darts back stumbling slightly on the curb. 

"What do you want?" Vader says to the empty air, feeling a hot flush rush up the back of his neck over the foolishness of talking to the wind. He shouldn't have the Power to speak with whatever spirit this is. He didn't have anything but the barest access to that Power. He's _tried_.

It was one thing, spirits affecting the physical world. That was Power that came from the spirit. But if the spirit didn't have the Power, it could be lent from a Caster. And for direct communication both parties needed the skill. But if this spirit was demanding Vader's help, then maybe...

The mist coalesces into almost a figure. He cuts his hand through it, disrupting the mist. "No. I'm not going to play charades. I'm not playing twenty questions. Tell me what you want now or not at all."

The air grows a little chiller and his hope rises. Could Aphra have been brought to him because his Powers were returning? Was Kenobi's hold slipping at last?

Kenobi would have treated this spirit with sympathy, jumping through every little hoop to help it. Make it more comfortable. He would have too once. And maybe before he'd have felt sympathy for these displaced souls, but not anymore. He'd sacrificed enough, suffered enough, that he'd thought he'd earned his peace. He had no patience for this work.

He turns quickly at the chill touch on his shoulder. Nothing is there. He clenches his fist and closes his eyes. He doesn't have time for this. Blood pounds in his ears and he strains towards that Power that threads itself around his soul. 

It is a struggle, as it always is these days. The sharp ache of a migraine that he will spend hours nursing stabs the nerves behind his eyes but he locks his knees and focuses. It is like trying to warm an ocean with wisps of smoke from what was once a brightly burning star. Sweat drips from his face and he grits his teeth. 

Power is controlled with Will. That was true with both Palpatine and Kenobi. Palpatine, however, had taught him how to wrap his Power around another's' Will, dead or alive, and it was those lessons that he reaches for now. 

"Go," Vader says trying to find the tightly coiled spark of the ghost. Anything that could interact with the physical world this much wasn't going to be able to hide from him. Not for long, even while he was in this pitiful state. 

"GO," Vader says again. This time, his Power catches the Will. His voice echos and the thread of Power carries it across the empty rest stop. The rush of euphoric power fills him for a moment and he bares his teeth in a grin. 

But then the now familiar burnout crashes over him and his bad leg folds underneath him. Every time, every single time this happens, it's like Kenobi's mocking Vader's weakness, laughing at his lack of Power. _How the mighty have fallen_. He once had everything. Then, Kenobi came and ripped it from him forcing him to scuttle and hide himself. 

Every time he managed to grasp even the wisp of Power left to him, he could hold onto the fact that not even Kenobi could take it from him completely. And every time the burnout hit, he was forced to face the fact that Kenobi still managed to take everything that _mattered_. It was a victory, but a bitter one. 

His breath catches and he brings his hand up to his chest and just concentrates on breathing as his vision starts to darken. He sits there in the grass, the fog and dew soaking into his pants and he hates that he's been reduced to this, grasping at mere scraps of Power. Sitting on the ground, numb and exhausted, from what would have once been done with barely a thought.

* * *

 

When he limps back to the car and yanks open the door, Aphra is glaring off to the side with her arms folded across her chest. The interior of the car looks undamaged so she apparently didn't try to hard to escape and that's about all he has the energy to care about. He'll want to double check the engine and the exterior before they leave. Later. 

He collapses in his seat, not bothering to pull the door shut. Every motion sets off the throbbing pain behind his eyes and he wishes he could just carve his eyes out. It might hurt less. The smell of the car seems stronger now and grits his teeth against the nausea. He can't even tell if the nausea coming from too much adrenaline and too little food or the new migraine that's fully settled in now. Sleep might help, but he doubts it. 

"I didn't come on this trip to be sidelined, y'know?" Aphra says, still not looking at him.

He grunts an acknowledgment and fumbles for his keys. It takes a couple tries to get the keys into the ignition. The engine turns over just fine and he lets out the last breath of worry. It was always hard to tell how the supernatural would affect technology. Which was part of why Obi-Wan had driven--

He shuts down that thought. The past ten years and he'd given his old teacher barely a thought except in dreams of fire and pain. One week on the road with Aphra and it felt like _Kenobi_ came up in every conversation.

"Look, this is _my trip_ and if you want me to help you--" Aphra took a breath, obviously trying to find some sense of calm, "I didn't start this adventure to be locked in the car every time things get dicey. I've looked into some of this... stuff before finding you. I know how to protect myself and I am not useless here."

Vader slammed his prosthesis against the steering wheel. He doesn't want to be here. The sudden motion tips the nausea over the edge and he groans and leans out over the pavement, too exhausted to get to the rest stop's trash can. His stomach rolls and clenches and suddenly he's dry heaving. Fist clenching at his side and his other arm pressing tight into his stomach trying to force it into calm.

After a while the waves of nausea subside. There's a small pool of foul smelling bile just outside his door and he wrinkles his nose. Aphra has a frown of sympathy and offers him a water bottle a word.

He snatches it from her and rinses his mouth, opening the door and spitting that out too, before taking a small swallow. He takes a breath hoping that his stomach will stay settled. Aphra, thankfully is quiet now. 

Vader squints over at her, not quite able to make it a glare, and says, "You've blackmailed me into coming. You basically kidnapped me. I found a place where I could at least be content and now I'm being pulled back into this shit and you want to talk to me about _adventure_? This is my _life_. I'm doing this for one reason and one reason alone. I am not your friend or your--"

"I know, _I know_ ," Aphra said waving a hand dismissing Vader's words. "I'm the one who 'blackmailed you into coming' so I know exactly why you're here. Look, I'm just saying that I'm not cool with just being locked in the car while you run off and fight ghosts or whatever."

"I didn't lock you in. To be clear, the only reason I give a single shit--"

"What part of 'I know' is unclear?" She looks away again and glares into the darkness before turning back to him slowly. "Wait, the thing with the locks -- that wasn't you?"

"You think I care about your safety?" Vader dropped his head onto the wheel and just let it rest there breathing in the scent of leather. He is okay. 

"Sure, whatever, you can keep up your tough guy act. But how did it happen? You said your car was warded!"

"I was lying," Vader says.

" _What_?" Aphra's voice is low, practically a growl, and he could almost feel the heat of her glare on the back of his neck. It almost makes him want to smile.

"Your car was a monstrosity and you seemed reluctant to part with it. It seemed easiest to lie."

"You mean I let a ghost trap me in this car because I thought--" She takes a deep breath. "Okay. Fine. That's just-- whatever."

"You knew that my power had been stripped from me. I was surprised when you just believed me."

"I didn't know if wards have anything to do with your magical-whatever-issues! You were convincing. Anyway, if you are so 'powerless' than what was that?" She jerked her hand at the empty rest stop. "That thing was going to kill us! And you just blew it up! BOOM!" Aphra made brought her hands together and then made another 'boom' gesture and her fingers fluttered apart.

Vader frowned. "There was no explosion."

"God, you are too literal sometimes. I know there wasn't, it's not like I was watching since you abandoned me to the creepy locked car. Where I could have _died_. But the point remains! Ghosty-McGhost-Face is gone!"

"I've explained this before, my power is--"

"Bound, it's there but you can't use it, blah blah blah. I know already. You just seem to want to dwell on everything you can't do when you could be looking at all you can! You just banished a ghost, or whatever, to heaven or hell or non-denominational-afterlife. Whatever you believe in."

His knuckles are white and ache as he clenches his fist. He's tasting blood before he realizes he's bitten his tongue because no matter how he explains she does not understand. She wants _Kenobi_ , and has settled for him because there was no way Kenobi would bend his precious morals to help her. 

Before, Vader would have been able to out match Kenobi. Now? He was nothing. Reduced to working with scraps of Power and even that feeble usage sends him collapsing to the ground. They're both going to die on this trip and right now he's even looking forward to it.

"Fine then you can pout. That seems useful. Everyone has a shitty story behind them. _Try_ to keep in mind that you're not the only one. I'll just be over here not being an asshole unlike some people I could name." He hears the rustle of fabric as Aphra reaches back and pulls out her laptop from her backpack. The thump of her putting her seat back up and the hum of electronics.

_Don't engage_ , he reminded himself. This had been going better until this rest stop. Aphra obviously knew enough to get in trouble. She had found him. She knew about Padme, Luke and Leia. He was just going on this scavenger hunt to find the holy grail for Aphra and then he'd peel the location of Padme and his children out of Aphra any way he needed to. 

Kenobi's hand was all over this and for a moment he wonders if the man had orchestrated the whole 'adventure'. But no, Kenobi was conniving, but if he knew where Vader had been living this whole time... There was no way. Kenobi tried to cage Vader. Muzzle him so that the rest of the world would be 'safe.'

But he was exhausted and so _angry_. He doesn’t _want_ these reminders of a past he'd left behind. What he _wants_ is to to smash the windows with his fists and watch his blood run down the car door. He _wants_ to grab Aphra's head and slam it against the dashboard, break her fucking nose, and watch the arrogance in her eye melt into terror. He _wants_ to set the car on fire and feel it burn around them both as their skin melts off and their skulls can stare empty into the night.

He _wants_ to be back at his shitty little apartment where he could lock the door and never talk to another soul again.

Vader learned a long time ago that what he wanted didn't matter.


End file.
